Things you’re doing that will definitely destroy your marriage – Stop making these two mistakes and you’ll have a happier marriage. It’s absolutely exhausting trying to make your marriage work while keeping up with all of your other responsibilities.
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You may feel like you’re in it all alone, with no hope of things ever getting better.
When you took those vows of for better or worse, you really didn’t think that it would be for worse — or you’d probably never have gotten married in the first place.
The good news is not all unhappy marriages need to stay that way. It doesn’t always require your spouse to join in with you from the beginning of your plan to make the marriage better. Sometimes you hold the key to turning everything around — if you just stop making two basic mistakes.
Before we get into details, it’s important to know what a good marriage is.
A good marriage consists of two whole, happy people who choose marriage.
You can think of these two happy people as each existing in a separate circle. These separate circles are inside of another circle which represents their marriage. Together these individuals focus on building their marriage.
Certainly not all, but most married couples have children. By becoming parents, a couple chooses to work together (ideally) to provide and care for their children.
Going back to the circles, each child exists in a circle outside of the marriage circle. They’re outside because both parents and children need a solid base to build the family on — and that’s those two whole, happy adults and their vibrant marriage.
That’s the ideal situation. But obviously that’s not your situation. You’ve got anything but an ideal marriage, or you wouldn’t feel so unhappy in it.
There are two common mistakes people make that result in an unhappy marriage.
1. Abdicating responsibility for yourself existing as a whole, happy person.
Instead of each spouse being in their own circle as in the ideal marriage situation, in this case, at least one spouse lacks their own circle. They constantly look outside of themselves for something or someone that will make them feel whole and happy.
Looking outside of themselves doesn’t necessarily mean having an affair. It could also mean that they’re seeking experiences that at least used to bring them joy (or maybe just a sense of peace): drinking, gambling, shopping, eating excessively, pornography, drugs, even only living life through or for their spouse or children.