19. Mick Jagger
We’re rounding off the last of the big three of embarrassing performances from major musicians – the holy trinity of rock just happen to be some of the worst actors around. And while no one will deny their stage presence is commanding, alluring and often riveting – particularly Mick Jagger who knows how to work an audience so well he can come out once a year at the Super Bowl, perform the same damn three songs and hibernate until next February – their acting sucks.
Perhaps tired of Martin Scorcese appropriating his voice countless times, Jagger attempted a serious role in the 1992 sci-fi thriller Freejack. For those who don’t remember, it’s the one where Anthony Hopkinswants to live out his days in Emilio Estevez‘ body (we had to look it up, too). Jagger plays Victor Vacendek, a hard-nosed mercenary sent to capture Estevez. He sneers his way through the role much the same way he does on stage, only it really doesn’t work here. It’s laughably bad.
18. Prince
Prince made three attempts to to crack the silver screen. The first, Purple Rain, is a hard performance to criticize as the film was an excuse to showcase its excellent soundtrack. The next two, however, are considered fair game. After the success of Rain, the studio demanded a follow-up, preferably a sequel. Instead, Prince brought them Under The Cherry Moon, a black and white romantic comedy about two gigolos trying to swindle wealthy French women. The kind of autonomy given to the tiny Minnesotan is something for which most directors would kill. He fired the film’s first director, Mary Lambert, and tried to cast his girlfriend with no acting ability as his foil (he eventually caved on the latter, replacing her with Kristen Scott Thomas in her first role).
Prince, as Christopher Tracy, is a bit of a jerk. The performance is shrill and obnoxious, and even that is faint praise if only because it acknowledges there was a performance. And the soundtrack he provided was seen as even more alienating to fans.
He doubled down in 1990 with another director/actor gig with the semi-sequel to Rain the studios always wanted, Graffiti Bridge. The soundtrack was far more mainstream and appreciated. The same can’t be said for his performance.
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