Ways to win your ex back in a flash – We got you, girl. When a loving relationship ends, our intellectual self knows it’s over for a reason. We may feel satisfied… until the shock settles. Then the pain starts to kick in — emotional pain that devastates the heart, mind, and body.
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The feeling of loss kick-starts a cycle of emotions. One moment we are crying, the next we are angry, and then we’re in denial. We cycle through these thoughts in no particular order and our survival mode seeks a solution to feel better.
It feels like we have been through an emotional boxing match, and we reach out to friends, family, self-help resources, maybe a therapist. This support helps in the moment, and we oblige when told to block our ex from our social media and our phone.
Making it through each day feels like a major accomplishment. And then our coping mechanisms begin to fail.
With limited sleep and energy, our brain is running on adrenaline. Our tactic to remove him from all of our technology has backfired because this was done too soon in our healing process. We begin to wonder if our ex has been trying to reach us and we’ve missed it. Now what?
During this cycle we slowly begin to lose ourselves and our dignity. We begin to reach out to him or her with false expectations. When they don’t respond, or we hear something different than we had hoped, we begin to feel ignored or angry. This is when obsession begins.
We become focused on gaining their attention, but under our own pretenses. Our actions at this point are why we are labeled the awful stereotype of “psycho-ex.” We are not crazy. We are in pain and don’t know how to heal ourselves.
It takes tremendous strength, energy, and mindful balance to recover from loss, and a breakup can be a significant loss. This may prevent us from accepting and letting go, therefore remaining stuck in false reality.
We all wish for some kind of magical advice on how to win him or her back. There ain’t no such thing. But for this moment, I’m hoping that some strategies may resonate:
1. Be still.
Feelings are frightening. They can be paralyzing, confusing, and consuming. Just breathe. We need to allow these powerful emotions to flow through our mind and body. It can help bring clarity and further awareness. Natural tears represent our capacity to feel. We are not numb; we are tender human beings. Our mind and body have intentional messages to share.