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Help me!! This girl is a financial burden to me – Young man narrates the problem his girlfriend is giving him

Read the story of a Nairaland user who got frustrated by being overburdened by his girlfriend’s financial woes.

Hi Romancelanders, don’t know if it’s right to share this topic here, but I’ll do it for now.

I’m Victory, from the East and currently a resident of Edo state. I came to this state, as an intern and thereafter, still served here, and in the course of all these, I thought out and established a laundry business, which is just about 8 months old. This was to keep life going and to better bond well with the lady in my life currently.

While in Edo state, having rounded my internship & kickstarting service sometime around 2017, I met this Kiki Osemudiamen (Name changed), and it was nothing serious at 1st, cos I never really thought I’d date someone here, the fact is that I never thought I’d stay beyond my service year. I met her while she was in 200l. We encouraged each other, she saw potentials and had faith in me just like I have so much faith in her. She is simplistic, encourages me to save and I in turn, encouraged her and guided her through some of her studies. She passed her 2nd MB.BS. and is currently awaiting the lifting of the lockdown on schools, so she can start her clinical.

Problem is that she came from a not buoyant family financially, and although both parents are alive, she struggles to survive/feed daily. Her dad supplies about 1000litres/trip water to households, while her mum sells at the local market. I, on the other hand, came from a middle-class family but my Dad is late since 2012, and I’ve been a sponsor of my education and that of my younger ones through the lil I inherited (which mum manages for now) plus my various endeavors. She depends on me for daily meals and other basic essentials, In fact, I had to place her on salary in my laundry shop during this lockdown, so she plays the role of secretary in my shop too.

The latest challenge came about, yesterday. While she slept in the shop, I was out on an errand, someone sneaked into the shop and stole her android phone with all of her e-medics textbooks (she reads mostly e-copies because she can’t afford hardcopies), she has been crying all through and I really don’t know what to do. Since I knew her, She’d been an appendage and an extra financial burden to me, I can’t begin to list what I’ve done for her, although I kept reminding her to not have an entitlement mentality and she does appreciate. Out of desperation to ease her pain, I promised to sponsor her in getting a new phone. I have burdens, huge ones, I’m yet to acquire a diesel engine for my laundry (I use ponytail industrial iron which has higher voltage/current than normal ones), plus other related merchandise that I need to set up and I feel like she slows down my financial pace.

Honestly, I don’t do all these for her, hoping for any personal gains, in the words of my daddy in the Lord, Prophet T.B. Joshua, He said and I quote: “We make a living by what we get and we make a life by what we give” but I am almost fed up and tired, especially when I remember that both her parents are still alive.. I am scared that for the 1st time, I may fail her in that financial obligation because I honestly need money now, with the whole pandemic issue plus, I feel like she slows me down in life financially and a huge burden to me. Right now, she’s so attached to me, more so that when I initially wanted to halt our relationship, it almost nearly affected her academics negatively. Please I need matured minds to help me think this through and garnish me with advice(s) because I almost feel so choked up and a rising urge to relocate from here, so i can breathe again.

NB: Advice from married couples and those in serious relationships, will be highly appreciated.

Modified: She went to her bank (First bank) this morning, only to be informed that about 20k (Her mum’s business money) has been used to purchase recharge voucher. Her mum sends/receives money from distant customers through her account. Yesterday’s scenario, all over again. Please folks, lock your SIM cards just as much as you lock your phones. Learn from this painful experience please.

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