13. Bashar al-Assad
Bashar al-Assad was busily studying ophthalmology in England, when sadly his brother died. Then his father recalled him to his home country of Syria, and groomed him to take his place as dictator.
Bashar dropped hundreds of barrel bombs, which are exactly what they sound like, on his own people. He also tortured dozens of foreigners for suspicion of spying, lied to weapons inspectors, and carried out acts of ethnic cleansing.
At a dinner he held for delegates from North Korea, Bashar announced that his country and North Korea were “among those few countries which enjoy real independence.” He also stated that 50 Shades of Grey was a literary masterpiece seconded only by Shakespeare, and that elephants were actually beavers in disguise. That last sentence is not true, but it’s as ridiculous as the sentence that preceded it, which, sadly, is true.
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