I took note of every mean thing I said to my boyfriend for a month, And this is what I found out

Often, when I would engage in small arguments, I wasn’t actually angry. In fact, when I took note of when I was doing it, the most common emotion I felt was boredom. It seemed like I was nitpicking or feeding arguments simply to have something to do.

Almost every time I received a compliment, I said something negative. I decided to count self-deprecating or sarcastic responses to compliments as something mean, and I found that nearly every time, I responded that way. It was easier for me to dismiss a compliment than to accept it head-on and understand that he genuinely believed it.