6. She says: “Oh no, I wasn’t embarrassed.”
The truth: “I am not at all mortified by the weird sound my body made/the weird sound your body made. Hey, do I look like the type of person who gets easily freaked out by weird sounds and has to go to the bathroom for a while because uh, I just do and also because I need to breathe into a paper bag and text everyone I know because seriously, what was that sound??”
7. She says: “That’s so crazy. I had no idea I had my period.”
The truth: Oh, I knew. I knew.
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