10 Powerful ways to apologize to your partner when you’ve really messed up things

4. Say it with a note

Struggle to say the right words? Try writing a note that expresses how you feel about what happened. Convey that you’re sorry, and also add a little about how you think your actions may have made your spouse feel. Let her/him know that even if it takes some time, you want their forgiveness. Avoid trying to explain why it happened, as that may only do more damage — save that for a later time.