8. Acting like you don’t like someone
Psychologists have known for a while about a phenomenon called “reciprocity of liking”: When we think someone likes us, we tend to like them as well. In a 1959 study published In Human Relations, for example, participants were told that certain members of a group discussion would probably like them. (These group members were chosen randomly by the experimenter.) After the discussion, participants indicated that the people they liked best were the ones who supposedly liked them.
More recently, researchers at the University of Waterloo and the University of Manitoba found that when we expect people to accept us, we act warmer toward them — thereby increasing the chances that they really will like us. So even if you’re not sure how a person you’re interacting with feels about you, act like you like them and they’ll probably like you back. If, on the other hand, you don’t express fondness for the person you’re meeting, you could potentially turn them off.
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