Ways to get revenge: Because in Spinal Tap terms, severing his dong is turning it up to 11. When you find out someone’s been cheating on you, it’s easy to fly off the handle. You thought you were just putting his stuff in boxes, but suddenly the boxes are all on fire and you’re quietly chuckling and catching your breathing being like: Ikki Kotsugai, a Japanese boxer, knows this feeling well. When he discovered that his wife was having an affair with her boss, he stormed the office, cut off the dude’s penis, and flushed it down a toilet.
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“It was the most traumatic toilet plunging I have experience,” is what the office’s janitor would surely have said if anyone had interviewed him.
Cutting off a penis in a fit of rage isn’t a new phenomenon. Remember when Lorena Bobbittwhen nuts on her cheating husband and threw his penis out of the window (as one is wont to do with a severed member I suppose)?
The impulse makes sense: hit him where it hurts and keep him from doing it again.
But once that initial red wave of rage has passed, do you really want to come to with penis blood on your hands and The Daily Mail calling you for an exclusive interview? No. No you do not.
Here are 7 great ways to get revenge without having to take a sharpened blade to a penis that once brought you great joy.
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