So, no. You can’t get the big, hard stuff that’s not working to change with appreciation alone. However, appreciation changes the feeling between the two of you. It helps you soften, reconnect, and lower your defenses so that it’s actually possible to work on and shift the big, hard stuff that’s not working.
Need some signs your appreciation is filling him up in a good way? Look for these signs of change in him:
- His mood improves
- You notice a little light come on in him
- His chest puffs up a little
- He smiles or grunts approvingly
- You two have more sex (and higher quality sex)
- He starts to appreciate you, acts more thoughtful, and starts doing “little things” (that matter so much somehow!) for you
Alternately, you may not get any feedback for a while. Keep doing it anyway. If his bank account is really low, he’ll likely wonder if you’re for real or trying to get one over on him. Keep showing appreciation anyway. It will pay off!
When you practice appreciation authentically, those you’re showing appreciation to will rise in value and worth in your eyes. And a secret plus is that you’ll also feel better.
Simply put, appreciation makes everyone feel their best — men and women alike. When we feeling at our best, our most highly-prized values come tumbling out. We can’t help but lavish our best selves on those around us.
By LiYana Silver, Yourtango.com
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