13. Treat them like a human being: Just be nice and treat them like a person. If they are interested look for the signals. Smiling at you, tilting their head when they talk to you, laughing harder that the joke should warrant, touching your arm when talking, crossing their legs toward you, saying things that continue the conversation rather than stop it. Get used to being shot down.. it happens 90% of the time to even the most attractive people (not their type, already in a relationship). Be okay with it and move on.
14. Let your eyes do most of the flirting: When I like a girl, then my eyes do a lot of the flirting. I smirk a lot, raise my eyebrows at the right times, and my tone of voice is suggestive no matter what I’m saying. At some point I’ll start interjecting sexual/physical comments, not exactly overt sexual comments directed at her, but things that relate to sex or body parts.
For example, if a girl is laughing at my jokes and she says I’m funny, then I’ll tease her and say something like, ‘Yeah, whatever! Girls are easy to make laugh. Usually I just have to pull my pants down though!’
A lot of times, it’s actual teasing in a playful way. I was on a date with a girl that had a snap story a couple months back that showed her buying a cocktail, because it had Ugli fruit in it and she loves Ugli fruit. I saw Ugli fruit at the grocery store and bought one. On the date I told her, ‘I have something back at my house for you. It’s very ugly and it made me think of you instantly!’
That’s kind of a dickhead thing to say so she got kind of frowny and said, ‘Oh wow, thanks…’ and then I said, ‘Well, it’s an Ugli fruit. I remembered how much you love them, so I got one for you. What’d you think I meant?’
I will do that pretty regularly to women. If I compliment them, or be nice, it’s going to be hidden by an insult or tease. That way when it comes out what I actually meant, it’s that much nicer and sweet to say. Sometimes I’ll say or do something nice and then take it away, or take it back in a teasing way, too.
On Valentine’s day, I snapped the same girl a picture of a chocolate heart. I told her it was for her. She said that was sweet.
I immediately sent her another snap of me unwrapping the heart and promptly popping it into my mouth, ‘Your heart was delicious.’ She responded with, ‘Hey! That’s not nice!’
So I said, ‘Well, it was the easiest way I could think of getting your heart to melt.’
So here’s the point, I’m constantly teasing. It doesn’t matter if I’m nice, it doesn’t matter if I’m a jerk. I constantly switch between the two to make it a chaotic neutral with a girl. Her feelings go up, they go down, and they constantly end up in the middle. That’s all of how I flirt.
Eyes, tone of voice, mischief, sexual/physical comments, teasing.”
15. Actually introduce yourself: Just smile and introduce yourself. Very rarely are you going to come across someone bitchy enough to ignore you or tell you to fuck immediately off. Then the doors open. Just talk. ‘So how do you like this place?’ ‘What are you drinking? That looks good.’ If she’s not interested or says she has a boyfriend, just say, ‘Fair enough, have a great day/evening’ with a smile and move on to the next.
16. Show them pictures of dogs: I show pictures of dogs. It doesn’t work that often but when it does you know she at least gotta be awesome.
17. Smile at them: If they happen to look at me, I smile, then after a second look somewhere else and back to them. When near them, I tend to lean in closer to them, but never cross any common courtesy boundaries. If I’m sure the person I flirt with is at the very least interested in me: If our hands are in close proximity I’ll try to make contact. Not grab their hand, but tap it a little.
18. Use sarcasm: Just don’t think of it as flirting, think of it as genuinely talking to someone but with a bit of tongue-in-cheek humor. Eye contact, smiling, being interested (or pretending to be interested) in what they’re saying, but most importantly: humor. What comes naturally for me is some mix of sarcasm and dark humor. But that’s the key – ‘comes naturally’. You can’t really force any type of humor or else it’s not funny. I might be cheating because I grew up with 2 sisters, so talking to a girl was always natural for me. I feel like the biggest issue most guys make is they think too hard about what to say, rather than just relaxing and letting a conversation happen.
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