Keep a comfortable distance. Depending on whether you already know her or if you’re talking to her for the first time, it is advisable to maintain a safe “conversation distance” which is around one and a half to two feet between the two of you.
Getting too close to her personal space can be invasive *especially to girls*, and staying too far away can be interpreted as a sign of a lack of confidence and aloofness.
Try not to dominate the conversation. If you want to know how to talk to a girl you like, don’t be too dominant. As much as you would like to show off and try to impress her, dominating the conversation would make the interaction one-sided and might cut it short. Always remember to keep the conversation balanced.
Come up with topics that both of you can relate to and think of yourself as an interviewer. Ask more questions rather than forcibly shoving information onto her – more than what she needs to hear.
Use tasteful language. Even if the girl you like is “liberal” in her use of language, you should still anchor your choice of words towards the polite conversational type.
Trying to sound cool by punctuating your statements with profanity, and acting hip by relying too much on slang, would make her question your intentions as well as your intelligence. Stay classy but not too Shakespeare-ish.
Use hand gestures. If “manners maketh a man,” gestures tell the insides of a man’s head. Hand gestures have many uses. It can be an indicator of your current state of mind or emotion, and also as a means to add flair to your conversation. Adopt hand gestures that show confidence, sincerity, and intellect. Avoid hand gestures that will be considered offensive and obscene.
Compliment her. But not too much – that it looks like obvious flattery. It could be something simple as noticing her shirt, her hair, or anything on her person that could be fascinating with the obvious exception of her “other” lady parts. It is also advisable to start your conversation with a compliment, as it is a sign of admiration and interest.
#11 Touching and physical contact. Just like the way you should mind your distance, you should also be very careful when initiating physical contact. Any form of physical contact that is beyond casual or friendly is out of the question.
The acceptable repertoire includes high fives, fist bumps, and the friendly arm of shoulder touch. These friendly touches happen especially if the conversation becomes enjoyable. But one must not get carried away.
#12 Keep the conversation going. There are unavoidable moments when you’ll be caught in the moment enjoying her presence, and you’ll want to stay that way just staring at her. However, letting “dead air” or gaps of silence interrupt your conversation would only make it awkward and possibly bring it to an abrupt end. Instead…
a. Ask her questions – not to be nosy or prying, just the right questions to show that you’re interested in her activities.
b. Crack a joke – a way to lighten the mood and possibly bring the conversation to a new topic.
c. Use open-ended questions – avoid questions answerable by yes or no.
Striking up a good conversation can be daunting, but if you follow these tips for how to talk to a girl you like, it can be pulled off with a combination of confidence, proper self-presentation, and the right choice of words.
By Paul Timothy Mangay, Lovepanky
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