LADIES: 5 ‘Golden Rules’ for turning your booty call into your boyfriend

Turning booty call into your boyfriend: For the booty call you think could be bae. Reader Arielle wrote a nice response to the post How Often Do Fuck Buddies Become Girlfriends?, basically outlining the 6 rules of having a fuck buddy who you might want to turn into a partner some day. All of my relationships have been friends with benefits, that have turned into relationships. Twice I’ve gotten my heart broken because the guy was really emotionally damaged, and it didn’t turn into a relationship.

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My recommendations:

1. Go with the flow.

Don’t try to control the direction of everything, and be wary if he’s trying to control it. If he’s trying to set arbitrary rules or limit how much he sees you or the situations you do together, tell him to chill out or get out.

2. Don’t limit the affection.

Be affectionate, sweet, caring, everything that you would be to your close friends. If you start to feel resentful that you’re not getting more from him, that’s a red flag, and you need to discuss it with him (in person, not text) or pull back.

Don’t let his issues with relationships prevent you from expressing your emotions, expressing romantic feelings, being affectionate, being yourself. If you feel nervous or shy in his presence or lose your confidence, you need to get over it asap: FWB situations are abusive to anyone who can’t speak their mind, and a guy will lose respect for you and himself if he knows you’re letting him use you. You need to make it clear that you have a great time with him and would regret not getting to know him better.

If he asks for more, give him a reason for why this arrangement temporarily works right now for you: you just got out of a relationship, you’re focused on school and just want to have fun, etc.