7. Pee with the door open
I know I’m getting into squeamish territory for some, but I’m afraid I have to go there. As long as you’re marrying an adult, I can assure you that they know that you pee. Do you really want to have to be closing and opening the bathroom door every time you go in there?
I mean, this guy has obviously seen your vagina (sorry for those who believe in waiting to havesex until after marriage; this essay isn’t for you!). And, you know, he’s done things to you. So just get over your dainty self.
8. Go number two
Yes, I recommend pooping in front of your future spouse. It doesn’t have to be an event with tickets, but maybe you just leave the door open a little the first time and then a little more the next time. Why? Because, honey, this is just about the least conscious you can be in front of someone. The someone you (hopefully) will live with until you die.
Now, if you’ve ever helped care for a dying older relative, you already know that this functioning can stop at a certain point in time. And you do know that when you have a baby everything isn’t very… neat. I’m just saying.
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