4. You assume the worst about your partner.
When you and your S.O. are working through a problem, give her the benefit of the doubt. She’s probably not trying to draw the argument out and she’s not trying to hurt you. More likely than not, she, too, wants to move past the issue as quickly as possible, said Laurel Steinberg, a New York-based relationship expert and an adjunct professor of psychology at Columbia University.
“Before reacting to something your partner has done or said that rubbed you the wrong way, try to first consider her intentions,” she said. “Did she intend to hurt your feelings or be inconsiderate? Most likely, the answer is no and the problem was simply the result of carelessness or not understanding your expectations.”
And if she really was trying to hurt you on purpose, give some deep consideration to staying in the relationship. “There is no room for intentional cruelty in a loving relationship,” she said.
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