Ways to stay YOU – You’re still an “I” even after “I do” Have you ever had a friend or colleague ask your opinion on something, and you find yourself answering for both you AND your mate? A recent study finds that an overwhelming amount of newlyweds are losing sight of their individual identity, exchanging “I” for “We.”
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“We like that movie, we’re into yoga, we don’t care for that restaurant.” Sometimes our identities can slowly become so wrapped up in ourrelationships that it’s difficult to discern who we are outside of our partner.
But when we’re talking long-term happiness, science strongly urges married couples to stoponly thinking about themselves as a pair. Research by the Journal of Marriage and Familyindicates that maintaining separate friendships and hobbies will preserve each person’s satisfaction in the long run. The short version: your marriage is a huge part of who you are, but it’s not ALL of who you are.
Let’s talk 5 small, superlatively simple ways to keep your relationship independence:
1. Have your own special, dedicated space.
Your own space does not by any means indicate you should keep your own permanent residence, but rather have your own space to escape. A place you every once in a while to meditate, decompress or merely relish in your own thoughts, such as a quiet spot overlooking the city or an overgrown wildflower field where you find peace and serenity — just as long as it’s a sanctuary for you.
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