8. None of this was our fault.
If there’s one thing that people need to understand, it’s that it’s never the victim’s fault. The victim has no power over the way an abuser chose to react. An abuser has a multitude of options in dealing with a person they’re angry with, but when the outlet they choose is abuse, that’s their choice — not the victim’s. If more people understood that, more victims would seek help.
It doesn’t matter how much sex a victim had or didn’t have with someone, how many times they started an argument, if they were lazy as hell, or anything else they did to piss off their abuser — abuse happens become someone chooses to abuse another person.
As I said before, victims already carry around a lot of guilt and the only way to heal is to understand that we truly were victims. The way someone chose to hurt us wasn’t our fault and we need you to believe that so we can truly accept it. Too many victims are still being abused because they don’t understand that what’s happening to them isn’t their fault.
As the nation takes notice of an issue that has plagued humanity for far too long, please take the time to actually listen to the victims.
Victims don’t just want to be noticed and they don’t just want to be heard. If we as a nationreally want to help victims become survivors, we need to truly understand them.
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