9. They have unreasonable levels of perfectionism.
Demanding perfection amounts to dominion of the family and attempts to force their personalities into sadistic submission. When the family masters one area of criticism, the addict simply harps on a new complaint. Unreasonable expectations of perfection usually get quite severe before the children become old enough to escape the home.
It often takes the partner a long time to realize that the family cannot please the addict no matter how hard they try. By the time the partner starts trying to stand up to undeserved blame, everyone in the family is fighting for emotional survival.
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