8. You can’t count on him.
Unreliable people promise to help you, but forget to follow through. They miss appointments with you, are never on time for your get-togethers, and can’t be counted on to honor their commitments.
- How this relationship affects you: For the person with low self-esteem, this relationship leaves you feeling unloved and not valued. You start to think that this is your fault, and that if only you were “better,” then this person would be more reliable. For those with high self-esteem, you realize that this is an unreliable person, and it’s not your fault. Therefore, this relationship may make you angry and prone to complain about your unreliable friend.
- How to handle this: With the unreliable person, you must set firm and clear boundaries. The next time the person makes an appointment with you, explain that your time is valuable and that if he or she is not there within 15 minutes of the appointed time, you’ll need to leave. You must set boundaries with the person ahead of time, or you may end up feeling like a victim—which you’re not.
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