3. You’re comparing your partner to others — and not in a good way.
Do you ever think, “I wish my husband was more like Susie’s husband” or “I deserve someone who would bring me flowers every day?” “When you start comparing your partner or relationship to others, you’ve got one foot out the door,” says Cohen. “Maybe you won’t actually act on it and leave, but it’s a sign that you’re mentally checked out.”
Cohen says that pop culture supports this negative thinking—drinking wine every night and complaining about what’s not great in your life is a common thread on social media and reality TV shows. But it’s a hidden marriage killer.
“If you’re annoyed all the time, you are sour on the inside and just swimming in negativity,” says Cohen, who says to amp up the positivity, quit complaining, and do a self-check on whether your contrary feelings toward your partner are actually valid.
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