Day 4: Talk about how your last fight would have been covered on “Law & Order.”
The difficult part about taking advice from friends or family is that they’re biased. Your mom is probably always going to think you’re the bee’s knees, and your best friends might be brave enough to tell you when you’re wrong, but maybe not. That’s why Feuerman suggests trying the ’emotional reappraisal’ technique.
When the house is quiet, sit down with your husband and talk about your latest disagreement. “Start by asking yourself how a neutral third party, like a judge or mediator, would describe your most recent fight or disagreement. Focus on behavior, not thoughts or feelings,” Feuerman explains. “This technique works because it helps you both get a more rational perspective of the problem. It’s likely to reduce stress and help you come together to resolve the problem.”
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