I dated him for 6 years, paid all his fees, had 7 abortions… but next week, he’s marrying my BF – Nigerian girl shares her story
It was time for her to fly back to Abuja, they said their goodbyes over the phone and she begged that he continued communicating. This, they did and when the list came out, she was accepted into the University to study Law (Her first choice).
Fast-forward to when she got into Uni:
Ms. J had convinced her parents that, she wanted an accommodation in campus. She told them that it would be easier for her to be more focussed with her studies, easier to access the school’s library, study there and also, easier for her to attend lectures on time because her aunt’s place was quite a distance from the University and the usual traffic will be stressful. Her parents “okayed” it and sent her funds for her hostel accommodation but unbeknownst to them, she did this so as not to be supervised by her aunt and also, to be free to be with her Mr. J (Young love).
In her first year, second semester, on her birthday to be precise, Mr. J asked her to be his girl, of which she agreed to and that indeed, changed the course of her destiny. She was so in love with Mr. J that she became his mother, care-taker, lover, financial adviser, helper, money lender, money-dasher, bill-footer and the list goes on. (By the way, she was from a very rich family, so money was truly never her problem). She did everything for and with him and maybe…, just maybe that’s why he decided to take her for granted.
Three days after her birthday, he begged her to come over and spend the night at his place (He shared a room with his friend). They had planned to “make love” that night. Of course, this was her first time, and she was very much okay giving her body to her first love. Things were going great, her clothes off, about getting a lubricant then a knock on the door was heard. It was his roommate. He had come back from a fellowship. The time was some minutes past 8pm. Though he had informed and begged his roommate to chill in another room that night, his roommate didn’t oblige. (His roommate was one of those overly-not soggy guys), so he had messed up their plans big time! So many pleas from Mr. J fell on deaf ears and he actually insisted on lying on the same bed as the girl and Mr. J.. In his own words, “I pay the same amount of money with you, so I have to sleep on the bed.”
Crazy right?…. Yes!
Every plan they had was shattered, she had to leave the room and head back to her hostel because the bed was not big enough to accommodate three people. Luckily, his apartment wasn’t so far from the hostel.
Four days after the incident, Ms. J paid in a huge sum of money into her boyfriend’s account and asked him to get a well furnished accommodation. The decision to do this was made after she consulted her closest friend on campus, Titi. Titi happened to be her bonk mate and also, course-mate. Mr. J, after series of refusal to accept her offer, later obliged (After all, it was beneficial to both of them). He got a house, very comfortable, got furniture and also, got a generator. The money was that much that he could get all these and have some more change for running around.
The night after he had settled into the new house, his “wash-night plan” was to deflower her. He made love to her (at least, that is what she thought). From that moment, she became his sex doll. Every time and everyday, he’d control her to his house for sex. Sometimes during her lectures, he will keep buzzing her till she finally decides to leave class for his apartment. He even suggested that she moved in with him, to stay from Monday to Fridays since she normally spends the weekend at her aunt’s. She accepted this, thinking it was in her own best interest. At least, everyone would know it is official – So, she thought.
His fourth year was a bit rough for him. He had quit his part time job in Ms. J‘s aunt’s place to fully concentrate in school, and for the fact that he was the first of five kids from a broken home and his mum did menial jobs to sustain herself and the kids, help from home wasn’t forthcoming. He was sad to say the least but Ms. J became his knight and shinning armour. She would make sure he lacked nothing, I mean nothing at all. Ms. J always got an excess of N70,000 monthly allowance from home, so she’d keep N20,000+ for herself and give N50,000 to her boyfriend. (It is noteworthy to mention that Mr. J was paid N50K monthly from his part time job he quit). Meaning, she started paying the exact same amount he was receiving when he was still working.. (Indeed, she truly loved this lad).
She’d use N20,000+ to take care of herself. Deprived herself of the things she normally used which were expensive and because she didn’t want her parents thinking about how she suddenly developed a lavish lifestyle, she never asked that they topped her monetary-allowance. Mr. J was living the life. Now he could afford to spend without thinking of how the money was made. Flexing at the detriment of his bae. Drinking, smoking and even womanising.. His true colours started showing but she still loved him, regardless.
Prior to his fourth year, after deflowering her, he normally wore a condom each time he wanted to have sex with her, but, after his fourth year; second semester, he insisted they go raw. This caused a strain in their relationship because Ms. J didn’t want it but he insisted that if she truly loved him, she would oblige. They had a serious fight over this, so she went back to her accommodation in school, once again, confided in Titi (who eventually became her best friend in Uni). Titi advised that she give in because she had already given a lot to the relationship and it will be dumb for her to lose him because of “sex”. And like always, she agreed.
Days after their fight, she went to his house to apologise but met a girl there. A 300L Law student who she recognised (She would later discover he had sex with her and many others too). Bae begged silly that night, cried her eyes off, cried like a pikin just so he could forgive her for refusing to have sex without a condom. But my guy refused. It took the intervention of Titi, who came to his house to subdue the whole tension and issue. Titi had played her part, time for her to go, he asked that he gets her number just so as to be able to reach Ms.J through her incase Ms.J’s phone is switched off. Ms. J, reluctantly accepted (She couldn’t do much at this point, because she didn’t want another issue and for the fact that Titi was her closest friend and the reason why things didn’t fall apart, she just kept mum in the background).