Things you should never say to a guy: The fling, the affair, the one-night stand, the friend with benefits: no strings attached sex has a certain thrill to it. For the sake of clarity, all the sex that will be referred to in this piece will be the kind that singles have rather than monogamous, regular intercourse with one relationship partner. While the latter is most people’s end goal, there’s nothing wrong with having some fun along the way.
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Sexy time with a new date doesn’t have as many expectations as it does when it comes to getting it on in a relationship, and plus you get that electric, heart-pounding feeling that comes with the newness of the experience. However, for as many perks that there are, there’s also a lot that you have to look out for if you plan on adding a few notches to your bedpost. Obviously, your safety needs have to be paramount, so you should get regular STD screenings and always use a condom or other form of birth control. Keep your wits about you, and if you’re intoxicated in any way, hopping into bed may not be the best idea.
There’s also a pretty major blunder that you have to be careful of, women. No, it’s not forgetting to shave your legs, pits, or downstairs, although that can be pretty embarrassing, too. It’s what you say. As Anna Hodgekiss of Daily Mail notes, the oxytocin released during sex “lowers our defenses and makes us trust people more.” If you’ve ever caught feelings for a guy after you have sex, this is why. While that’s a whole other can of worms, next time you’re turning down the lights, make sure you don’t ever repeat these phrases to your sexual partner.
10. “Thank you.”
On its surface, this one may seem pretty innocuous, and it’s definitely not the worst thing that you can ever say after resurfacing from under the covers. However, unless the guy is paying you for your services (and let’s sincerely hope that’s not what’s going on here), there’s no reason for you to thank him or for him to express his gratitude. Sex should be a mutual occurrence between two willing participants and not a favor that one grants to the other.
Now, if you accidentally say this one after sleeping with someone for the first time, you can just laugh it off or change the meaning, clarifying that you were thanking them for a good evening. That’s much more appropriate. We get it, though. Sometimes after really awesome sex, it’s hard to say much of anything at all.