3. Don’t be selfish.
I know that no-pressure sexual satisfaction is a big part of the draw here. I get that you don’t know this person well. I get that you are not that invested in them. I get it.
But don’t you freaking dare be selfish in bed. Seriously, how dare you?
And — this part goes out to readers in possession of penises especially — if it won’t get hard, let it go and focus elsewhere. There is nothing worse than being in bed trying to get someone to play and having them repeatedly stop everything to yank on their flaccid penis and bitch about it’s lack of compliance, or worse, make you futilely stroke, suck and otherwise service their non-tumescent member while they freak out.
I get it. It sucks to have this happen, but here are your options: A) Accept that the sun doesn’t rise and set by your penis and have some fun kissing and touching and exploring the hot nakedperson next to you, or B) Be a selfish asshole who leaves someone who barely knows you thinking, “I don’t want to touch, suck or even see that thing ever again. I’m so over this dick.“
(BTW, they mean both you and your member — wordplay!)
So, which of those guys do you want to be?
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