6. Do I want to use my partner’s cheating as a way to get “out”?
This may be the most important question of all.
If the groom saw the viral video of his fiancée kissing someone else and he felt angry, betrayed, and hurt, that’s normal. But if those feelings were accompanied by a sense of “well, now I can kick her to the curb,” that speaks to larger issues in the relationship. If you see a kiss like that and you can’t even imagine trying to fight through the hard emotions to get to a place of forgiveness someday, that says a lot.
The same goes for the bride (who, apparently, was the one who ended the engagement). If she saw that video make the rounds and knew that her fiancée saw it, and her reaction was “the easier thing to do is leave” — that probably suggests that her minor infidelity did hold a deeper meaning.
If you find out that a person you love has been hooking up with someone else for months on end behind your back, there are some trust issues at play and you’re probably better off apart.
But, if you find out that the person you love spent a sloppy afternoon kissing a stranger for a few minutes, is that cheating enough to destroy your relationship?
See, the kiss is just a kiss.
But what that kiss means, and what it really symbolizes within your relationship is what matters.
And, to some degree, the same goes for sex. But obviously, it’s much more serious.
But it comes down to the question of fight or flight.
Whether you’re the kisser or the cuckold, if you’d rather run away from the conflict than try to battle your way through it. Then, yes, the cheating is enough to kill your romance.
But, if when confronted with the news, your instincts aren’t immediately telling you to flee, you might be able to get past it one day. And maybe even grow stronger.
Yes, it is a betrayal, but it doesn’t need to be an automatic death sentence for your relationship.
Source: Yourtango
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